30 April 2005

Attack of the Weekend!

So...here's a summary of the beginning of our weekend. We (Shancole, Netty and I) went to So Long and much good burger-age was had. Then, since the stuff at the Union (concert, free stuff, etc.) was still going on, and since Aaron and Amber were there, we went to check it out. We got free mini-staplers, free Pepsi Edge (the Edge stands for crap), and saw Ben Kweller's concert. I'd never heard any of his music, so I had no idea what to expect. He put on a pretty good show...I don't think I'd consider myself a fan--his music was a little too...erratic for me-- but he was definitely entertaining to watch live. After the concert (and after none of us won a free grill or a $1k vacation) they were showing National Treasure, and since we were already there and it was free, we watched it. It's an alright movie, in its own stupid way. Nothing great, but easily worth $0. And now we're home. Galaxies seems likely.

29 April 2005

Location: Forum Hall, KSU Student Union

I just came up with a new word: greetarded. Definition: something as retarded as Greedo shooting first. As in, 'Dude, that Pepsi Edge stuff is Greetarded.' Use it, and tell your friends.


One more thing: I just read that they're planning 2 sequels. God loves me.

A very good movie

We (Netty, Aaron, and I) went last night to see Sin City. I'd been wanting to see it for a while and I'm glad I did. That movie is cool. I'd wanted to see it because of the style, which is a dark, comic book noir-ish kind of thing--the same kind of style I've had in mind for writing a Necromunda novel. (And coincidentally, there was a Vega's gang in this movie--it was awesome.) Most of the shots looked like panels straight from a comic book, from the framing to the lighting to the use of color. And they filtered/CG'd it so that a lot of the movie looks hand-drawn. Besides just looking cool, the storyline was entertaining and twisted, and the characters were complicated when they needed to be and stupid, gun-toting brutes when they needed to be.
Talking to Netty about it afterward, I realized you could watch this movie twenty times, watching for something different each time. For example, most of the movie is in almost-black-and-white, with certain things in color (blood, for one thing). The interesting (and puzzling) thing is the eyes--certain characters, at certain times, have colored eyes. It seemed to be just women, but it wasn't all of them...I don't know, but I could watch the movie again just looking to figure that out. And there are a dozen other things like that.
I can't recommend it for everyone, because I don't think everyone would appreciate the style they're going for. And it's violent. Very violent. That didn't bother me in the least, but... Anyway, if you do see it, I'd suggest going into it with an open mind. Watch it for the movie that it is, not all the movies that it isn't. Of course, that's my advice for all movies. And it's a good thing to keep in mind, considering H2G2 comes out today...

28 April 2005

Location: Panera

Netty's sewing. Yes, sewing in Panera. She was waiting to see if her belly dancing shirt would come in at the last minute...it didn't, so she's sewing a string of jinglebobs on a t-shirt. Not sure how that's gonna look, but it's sure funny watching her sew and eat at the same time.

Oh, and I've decreed that Sin City shall be watched by me, today. Anybody wanna go with me?

27 April 2005

Bought some dark side M&M's...pretty cool colors, huh?

24 April 2005

Matrix ping pong

A guy showed this at the Japanese Festival today. Very entertaining.

21 April 2005

Because a lot of you have been asking me about Turpins in the Civil War, here ya go:

Because 3 posts in 1 day just isn't enough...

The Dick Turpin thing got me to wondering...

English and French: from an Anglo-Norman French form of the Old Norse personal name þórfinnr, composed of the elements þórr, the name of the god of thunder in Scandinavian mythology (see
Thor) + the ethnic name Finnr Finn. This may have absorbed another name, Turpius, Turpinus (from Latin turpis ugly, base), one of the self-abasing names adopted as a mark of humility by the early Christians. It was borne by the archbishop of Rheims in the Charlemagne legend.Dictionary of American Family Names, Oxford University Press, ISBN 0-19-508137-4

Top Places of Origin for turpin

Place ofOrigin/ Turpin Immigrants
Great Britain/2

Compiled by Ancestry.com from the New York Passenger Lists

Coat of Arms!

Here's a cool store. You give them your name and they send you the earliest coat of arms/family crest associated with it (and family history, if you want it). You can get them on a lot of different items--glasses, shirts, wedding gifts, rings (very cool), etc., and if you don't want a physical one, you can have them email it to you for pretty cheap. It's most excellent. The only problem is that you can't see your coat of arms before you order. But I'm seriously considering getting something from them.


Combine Netty's (old) last name and my last name, and what do you get? Why, an English thief/highwayman, of course!
Turpin, Dick, 1706-39, English robber. After a short and brutal career of horse stealing and general crime he was hanged at York. The fameor notorietythat he later achieved derives mainly from W. H. Ainsworth's romance, Rookwood (1834), which is based upon his life. Turpin's famous ride from London to York on his mare, Black Bess, is fiction, and his actual exploits were not of a romantic character.

For more, go here.

Update, Operation Spur

Got this reply today. It's a step in the right direction.

Hi Chris,

Thank you for contacting CafePress.com

Thank you for your suggestion. Your request has been forwarded directly to our product manager for further review and consideration. Please check our message boards for updates and announcements from CafePress.com.


Britta A.
Inbound Marketing Specialist
1-877-809-1659 Toll Free
510-877-1579 Intl/Local

That's right: directly to the product manager. Booyah.


Phase one (email CafePress) complete:

To Whom It May Concern:

First of all, let me apologize. I don't actually have a problem, but I couldn't figure out another way to contact the right people.

What I have is a suggestion. I know that CafePress prides itself on offering all the latest 'hip' and 'trendy' products for your users to customize. And let me say, you usually do a fantastic job of it. Hence my disappointment at discovering that you don't offer spurs. As I'm sure you know, they are quickly becoming the next big thing. To put it simply, anybody who's anybody is wearing spurs nowadays, and you don't offer them. I can only assume that you have something in the works, and if not, please consider it. I know several dozen people ready to order customized spurs from CafePress. Thank you.

~Chris Turpin, loyal customer

20 April 2005


In case you missed it, I added an Answers.com search box to my sidebar. If you've never used it before, you're missing out on informational awesomeness. Give it a try.

SWAT Monkey!

I'm not much of a news-blogger, but this is too cool not to post. A guy in Arizona wants to get a grant to buy a monkey for his SWAT team! Not even kidding.

17 April 2005

Location: Best Western, Limon, CO

Well, we got Tara married. The wedding went all according to plan, I guess. I was on the program as 'gift table attendant' before I even knew I had the job...pretty funny. And Netty was 'personal attendant' or somesuch. The reception was in the basement, with sandwich-type food and lemonade.

We didn't know what we wanted to do when it was all over, and we both started feeling sick, which was powerfully uncool. We ended up driving through Garden of the Gods, which Netty hadn't seen before, and then parking in Old Colorado City and taking a car-nap. When we woke up, feeling a little better, we went into Manitou Springs to look for food. Advice: don't ever go there looking for food--the few places they have look good, but most of them are expensive and for some reason don't take credit cards... There were a couple of cool stores there. I bought some Chocolate Mint syrup at a store called Spice of Life, and there was a fondue restaurant we wanted to go to, but the cheapest meal option was $36/person.

So we left, and Netty was starting to feel really bad and I was, too, but I wanted to get home. After an hour of driving, though, I decided I'd had enough, so we stopped here for the night. We're both feeling much better now. Checkout's at 11, and then we'll be on the road back to Manhappiness.

15 April 2005

Location: Comfort Inn, Colorado Springs

So, a few things have happened since my last post. The poetry slam was fun. Taylor Mali was awesome as usual. He performed four or five poems, then the slam started. There were a few really good performances and a couple really bad ones (by annoying people I know from class), but the best guy, in my opinion, won, which was good. Then we slept, packed, and hit the road.

Three Panera bagels, seven hours of driving, two bathroom stops, and one Quizno's sandwich later and we were at the church for Tara's wedding rehearsal. It was rehearsal-rific, and there was spaghetti for dinner afterwards. Now we're hanging out at the motel (the younguns are swimming). Pretty soon Netty and I are going over to Tara and Dan's apartment, which is where we're sleeping tonight.

Since the wedding, etc. starts so early tomorrow, it'll all be over by 2, making a little detour to Flatirons a distinct possibility...

Well, I'm supposed to be working on a story this weekend, so I'll get back to it.

14 April 2005

Location: Union Station

We're here waiting for the poetry slam to start, and since we were just at Planet Sub, I'll tell you what I thought. Because I know that you're dying to know. I ordered a chicken parmesan sub--good, but falls apart...it got a 7/10. Besides the food, they had Barq's,which is always a plus, but no foam soap in the bathroom is a negative, so that balances out, leaving the score at 7/10. So now you know.
Location: Panera


Go there. Don't ask. Just go. Trust me.
Location: Panera

More spur info: apparently, spurs make little or no noise on their own. People put little metal beads on them called 'jinglebobs' to make noise. Jinglebobs are critical, since the jingle is one of the things that make spurs cool. So, when all you cool kids order your spurs, make sure you pay extra for jinglebobs. :)

13 April 2005

I'm thinking something like this, but obviously the skull/vine motif would have to change, and the rowels (the spiky wheels) are a little too big for my taste. Posted by Hello

A new trend...maybe

Because starting fake campaigns and movements is apparently what I do now, I have a new one: a movement to make spurs fashionable. Yes, spurs. But without all the other cowboy stuff. Just the spurs. Why? Because I've decided that spurs are cool. So, if anyone out there wants to buy me a pair, I'll most likely wear them on a daily basis (I'd prefer dark or black metal, so they'll match my boots, but I'll take what I can get). And then you'll start to see all the cool kids wearing 'em. I'm tellin ya'll, spurs could be the next big thing (that I made up). Think about it.
(Michelle--I leave it to you to start the spur trend in G.C.)

09 April 2005

Location: my car, in the parking lot of the Union.

Netty's putting the last of the photos from Jayme's wedding into albums so we can give em to Irene, finally. This post is mainly just so I can be on the internet in my car, but I also have something to report. We were just at Wal-Mart, and I saw something horrible--ketchup-flavored potato chips. Did you know these existed? So it looks like, in addition to my secret society (shh), I'm also gonna be leading a crusade to put a stop to that crap. Actually, I'm out to shut down ketchup in general. It's a common misconception that ketchup is made of tomatoes. It is, in fact, demon blood, and those who eat it become minions of Hell. So keep that in mind next time you eat a burger.


Netty and I were talking about this the other night. For those who don't know, the psychological community (or, as I call it, the anti-science/logic community) now classifies so-called 'trans-sexuals' as their own gender. What they're trying to do is to seperate 'sex' from 'gender'--seperate one's physical orientation from their mental one. Now, with gay people, it's ok. If a guy decides he's more attracted to guys than girls, fine (it doesn't work w/ my own personal morality, but hey, this is America). BUT, the transsexual category is absurd. It's composed of people who think they feel other than what they physically are. Now, instead of a guy who's attracted to other guys, we have a guy who says 'I know I'm physically male, but I feel like a woman.' If you don't immediately see the absurdity in that statement, let me point it out. What does 'feel like a woman' mean? Guys, go ask the closest woman what it's like to be female, and girls, ask yourselves. The answers you'll get (if any) will have no more value than what you'd get asking me 'What's it like to be Chris?' (incidentally, I'd say something like 'it's supremely awesome'). If you were me, being me would be different. That's just how it works. Categorizing a guy who 'feels like a woman' as having his own gender is as ridiculous as categorizing Batman as trans-species because he 'feels like a bat.' He's just an insane person who dresses up like a bat--that doesn't make him part bat (Note: I am in NO WAY dissin da Bat--we's homies). In my view, if a person thinks they're something they're clearly not, that's a sign of mental instability, or at the least, mental weirdness. Now all you hippies out there--settle down. I'm not passing any moral judgements on transsexuals. I'm simply saying that I don't think that giving them their own gender category is a good idea, because it's an attempt to 'legitimize' a mental problem. If a person says 'I am a woman' one can see clearly for oneself whether that's true or not. "But if that's what they feel like, then isn't that what they are?" you say. No. If a person says he's Jesus, we don't say 'What up, Lord?' We say no. But, as I've learned, people today (and yes, I'll say it--I'm talking about liberals) don't like to be told they're wrong. They don't want to hear the word 'no', so they've devised an entire philosophy around not wanting to be wrong--the 'everyone's right' philosophy. You may not think you're familiar with this philosophy, but you probably are. They also call it 'open-mindedness.' In my version of 'open-mindedness,' one is open to and considers all possible sides of an issue before making a decision, and further, is willing at some future point to accept new evidence or arguments and change one's mind. The hippie version goes something like 'Everyone is right' (though, as the 'Free-thinkers Society' on campus does, they tend to leave Christians out of 'everyone'). By that philosophy, if a dude says he feels like a woman, who are we to argue? Well, I don't know who you are, but I can tell you that I'm a logical, free-thinking being who sees a confused man. Assigning a distinct gender to these people is like playing along with a schizophrenic's hallucinations.
But enough talk.

And here's my Beastmen...I just finished the big one in the middle a little while ago Posted by Hello

 Posted by Hello

Here's a couple pics of the big Necromunda truck-a-ma-thing I finished about a month ago. Posted by Hello

07 April 2005

Star Wars Pez! They had 'em at Dillons, and I couldn't stop myself. Note that there's only one pack that's not lemon or orange...some sort of citrus conspiracy? Posted by Hello
Location: Panera

Ok guys. I'm starting a secret society, and I'm looking for members. Our long-term goal(over thousands of years) will be the guided evolution of humanity. Let me know if you're in. Oh, and since I'm posting this on a public blog, our first order of business at our first meeting will be to work on that "secret" thing. :)

Someone doing something smart!

Location: home
Now don't get too excited...it wasn't that big a deal. There's a tree on campus that drops little red berries on the sidewalk, and they get trampled into red/yellow mush. It looks disgusting. And today, I saw a maintenance person in one of those snow-brush machines, sweeping/scraping it all off. Like I said, not a big thing, but innovative use of a machine indicates that someone, somewhere, was thinking.

05 April 2005

[No title yet...suggestions?]

Ron loved to eat potatoes. He started growing them in his back yard, but was disappointed with their size. The potatoes never grew large enough for him. He'd gone to college and had received a degree in biochemistry, which he'd never used. Now, though, he had the opportunity to use his knowledge and apply it to potatoes. He could learn to grow them large enough to satisfy his appetite for them. He began working in his basement, using gene sequencers and carefully applied doses of radiation. Soon the potatoes began to grow larger, some as large as his cat. These he baked in the oven, and ate with salt and butter and sour cream.

He continued his experimentation. Soon the potatoes were too big to fit in the oven. These he baked over large fires in his back yard, and he bought large bags of rock salt to sprinkle on them. He could no longer afford the required amounts of butter and sour cream.

It soon became apparent that he was reaching the upper limit of possible potato size. The potatoes didn't get much bigger than a small car, and it didn't appear as if they ever could. He ignored the evidence, though, and kept trying. He applied larger doses of chemicals and and radiation, and he tried cross-pollinating with other species. The potatoes didn't grow any larger, but they started to change. One of them moved. It was the only one growing in the backyard--there wasn't room for any others--and one day while Ron was watering, the ground shook. It was the potato.

Soon all his new potatoes were moving, but they stopped shaking after he baked them, so he ate them. He always felt bad for a time after eating one, as though he'd taken a life. But he didn't stop. This was his obsession now.

The shaking became more pronounced in later specimens. One shook itself right out of the ground after it had grown to full size, then sat there quivering. Wonderful, he thought. I've created the perfect potato--it even digs itself up for you. He decided to perfect his technique and then try to sell it. With the money, he could start new experiments, maybe with other foods. He was starting to get tired of potatoes anyway. So he kept working, and soon he had a systematic formula worked out--step-by-step instructions on how to grow giant, self-surfacing potatoes. He had only to test it once more. He planted the final potato.

It started shaking a couple days before its 'due-date,' as Ron thought of it. When it was time, he sat in a lawn chair on the back porch, waiting and watching. The ground was really shaking now--it was time. He walked over to where he could see the top of the tuber peeking out of the dirt, shaking its way free. As it emerged, he noticed that there was something different about this specimen. He waited for it to fully expose itself, at which point the shaking subsided somewhat. He stood close to it, noticing a dark line running across the surface of the potato. It looked like a deep crack. Maybe this was insect damage of some kind. As he probed it with his finger, the crack suddenly opened, and the potato ate him.

[Silly, huh?]
Location: Eisenhower, wating for Creative Writing to start

It's raining pretty hard now. I had to walk over from work, and I got soaked and cold. But hey, it's rain, which is, if you didn't know, one of my favorite things ever. Yes, ever. So getting cold wasn't all that bad.

I guess we're going to talk about short short stories tonight (yes, 'short' and then another 'short') and maybe do some writing. I wrote a short short at work last night, based on an incredibly silly poem I wrote in high school. The poem was about a farmer who wants to grow bigger pumpkins. He uses radiation (a la Spiderman, etc.) to make them bigger and bigger, until it gets a little out of control (you'll understand when/if you read the story). I wrote it to say to the teacher, "Ha! That crap's poetry, too!" (I wasn't too big a fan of poetry in high school), and she ended up loving it. Anyway, the story's based on that, but I switched the pumpkin to a potato. Since it's short, I'll post it for ya'lls. (Keep in mind it's a first draft, straight out of my brain and into my little compy.)

02 April 2005

Location: Panera

Disc golf + soup and sandwich at Panera = happy me. A useful formula, let me tell you.

01 April 2005

Location: Renaissance Lit class, Eisenhower Hall

So it looks like G-mail's upping its capacity to 2gb per user, presumably in response to Yahoo!'s increase to 1gb. My question is, what are people using all this space for, anyway? I mean, if the 1gb limit for Yahoo also applies to their Briefcase service, I can see that being useful...but a gig or 2 of email?